Laziness

I'm trying to convince myself the depression hasn't started creeping back in, but instead am just getting too comfortable in my new-found mental wellness, and it's really LAZINESS setting in.

It could also be that my work schedule has been thrown off balance. I am 9-1 Tuesdays through Fridays, but since they didn't prepare properly for various important workers going on vacations all at once (one for the whole summer), I have nearly doubled my hours to pick up the slack. I'm not allowed to work more than a certain number of hours per week. It doesn't seem like a big jump, but the hours are all over the place.

I had a breakdown of the hours in this spot, but I decided this post might already be boring enough without it ;)

By the time I get home, I'm often wiped out, and have to nap. When I get up, no matter how awake I am, I just don't want to leave the bed for anything. It's too hot in the living room. The bedroom is air-conditioned. And the computer is my tv. No reason to leave. I'm not even eating much anymore (which might also be contributing to my lack of energy).

(edit: confirmed- not eating enough is totally contributing to my lack of energy. Instead of working straight through 9-4, I had a break for lunch, and now I'm home and NOT exhausted! Wooo!)

I've had laundry - clean laundry, which Charles does, piling up on my closet floor for weeks. At this point, they're too wrinkly to even wear on days I'm not working. Yesterday, I finally got to it, and of course, my steamer went on the fritz. But I tried. Got almost everything that needs to be hung up done. I still have a moderate pile of wrinkles that need to be steamed, and folded, and then I'm gold.

Can't let that happen again. I really need to develop the habit of doing things when they should be done.

But the laziness has stunted my violin practice (I go days at a time without touching it). And am uninspired to make jewelry for the convention (I have made a whole bunch, though, so I think I'll be okay).

Maybe, also, it's time to step away from Facebook again, or at least remove it from my phone again. Fucking productivity-vampire.

Refreshed

I'm trying to refresh myself. You'll probably read this one before my previous post, but I mentioned in the last one that I've been feeling lazy (and hopefully not depressed). I'm trying to do a mental reset, but one thing at a time. First laundry. Then cleaning, ugh. Then I have to list all the other shit I've been putting off, and do those things (most of those will be things like, download songs friends suggested, finish commissions, put a dent in the reading list, move violin setup in bedroom, etc).

I think I'd like to spend just one day cleaning, and not a million days. One day of cleaning to put me at ease for taking care of myself next, and then I'm gonna have a nice cool bath, with a nice hot tea. Do a little spa-treatment, too (exfoliating, nails, maybe even shave my legs, ooooh).

But for now, I'm mentally noting things I want to start doing again - more livejournal updates, start using the exercise/diet/health blog again (and start exercising/dieting/getting healthy again, of course), running, doing things in a timely fashion (can't tell you how long it's taken to write one letter to a penpal)...

To start, I flushed out inactive accounts from my friends list (over half the friends I had, whoo), retired some old icons, got some new ones, and got a new lj layout that's pretty neat.

Lunch Hour

I experienced *official* Lunch Hour (tm) today for the first time ever!

In making room in my hours budget (going no more than 7, but having 8 scheduled), I had to take a mid-day break. My normal hours are from 9-1, so I suggested to my boss I break at 1. Nope, I was told I had to go at noon.

Noon. Okay, not so bad, right? WRONG.

I go to my usual spot, meet up with Brian, and we find the line for a sandwich is out the door. So we go across the street instead, and the line isn't so bad, but it's packed. We order before I realize it's packed with people who aren't eating. They're all waiting for their food.

We spent my entire lunch hour waiting for my food. I had 3 minutes to shove my sandwich down my face and drink the rest of my iced coffee (but fuck it, I gave myself 6).