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Update
First, let's get the crap out of the way to make room for some nice stuff...
1. I haven't seen Brian in about 3 weeks. It's heartbreaking, but I'm trying to not feel so bad about it. I think the medicine is keeping me out of the darkness.
2. The hormone therapy seems to be working as far as mood swings goes. Things that would send me screaming into a fit of rage and/or tears isn't bothering me so much (I have gotten irrationally irritated at times, toward the beginning of my cycle, but I expected it's not going to fix everything all at once). It's too late for it to reverse any part of my endometriosis - that damage is permanent, but I had hoped it would lessen some of the pain. Yesterday was the first day of my cycle, and I can say that while it wasn't as bad as it has been (a few months ago, over the summer, it got so bad, I feared, for the first time, that I'd have to go to the hospital), it's still extremely painful. I'm not 100% sure if it's due to my period, or if it's due to recent intestinal distress, but I was in so much pain while at work, I developed a fever and thought I would vomit. I don't know what's been causing my intestinal distress, but gut stuff and period stuff together are the worst. THE WORST. Ugh.
3. The sweater I've been knitting on and off since April is officially a bust. I'll be unraveling it this week, and starting a new project. Why? The specific yarn I chose to use, a Joann Fabrics brand, has been discontinued. In my quest to find some elsewhere, I've found exactly one skein of the 3 more I'll need to finish the body of the project (I'm not even counting the arms). I even tried finding another brand of a comparable yarn, but to no avail. I'm going to make a scarf instead.
/crap stuff. And now onto the nice.
4. I MADE MY OWN MARSHMALLOWS!!!!!! You guys. My own HOMEMADE motherfucking marshmallows. They're so good. I added some orange oil to the mix and they taste like orange marshmallows! I made these for the sole purpose of putting them in hot cocoa. I made over 50 1-inch squares. I'm totally making these for the holidays. Next experiment: Turkish Delights.
5. I'm still participating in Only Horror October. I've been posting the short films I watch on my facebook, but there's only been 3 so far - He Took His Skin Off For Me was very beautiful, and I highly recommend it. The Facts in the Case of Mister Hollow is an old favourite, partially made by the frontman of one of my favourite Ontario bands, and another I'd never seen before, Red Balloon had one moment that made me jump so bad I thought I'd fall back in my chair. Next on the list is The Little Mermaid.
5. I'm still participating in Inktober over on Instagram. Feel free to add me. Here are some of my favourite pieces so far.
1. I haven't seen Brian in about 3 weeks. It's heartbreaking, but I'm trying to not feel so bad about it. I think the medicine is keeping me out of the darkness.
2. The hormone therapy seems to be working as far as mood swings goes. Things that would send me screaming into a fit of rage and/or tears isn't bothering me so much (I have gotten irrationally irritated at times, toward the beginning of my cycle, but I expected it's not going to fix everything all at once). It's too late for it to reverse any part of my endometriosis - that damage is permanent, but I had hoped it would lessen some of the pain. Yesterday was the first day of my cycle, and I can say that while it wasn't as bad as it has been (a few months ago, over the summer, it got so bad, I feared, for the first time, that I'd have to go to the hospital), it's still extremely painful. I'm not 100% sure if it's due to my period, or if it's due to recent intestinal distress, but I was in so much pain while at work, I developed a fever and thought I would vomit. I don't know what's been causing my intestinal distress, but gut stuff and period stuff together are the worst. THE WORST. Ugh.
3. The sweater I've been knitting on and off since April is officially a bust. I'll be unraveling it this week, and starting a new project. Why? The specific yarn I chose to use, a Joann Fabrics brand, has been discontinued. In my quest to find some elsewhere, I've found exactly one skein of the 3 more I'll need to finish the body of the project (I'm not even counting the arms). I even tried finding another brand of a comparable yarn, but to no avail. I'm going to make a scarf instead.
/crap stuff. And now onto the nice.
4. I MADE MY OWN MARSHMALLOWS!!!!!! You guys. My own HOMEMADE motherfucking marshmallows. They're so good. I added some orange oil to the mix and they taste like orange marshmallows! I made these for the sole purpose of putting them in hot cocoa. I made over 50 1-inch squares. I'm totally making these for the holidays. Next experiment: Turkish Delights.
5. I'm still participating in Only Horror October. I've been posting the short films I watch on my facebook, but there's only been 3 so far - He Took His Skin Off For Me was very beautiful, and I highly recommend it. The Facts in the Case of Mister Hollow is an old favourite, partially made by the frontman of one of my favourite Ontario bands, and another I'd never seen before, Red Balloon had one moment that made me jump so bad I thought I'd fall back in my chair. Next on the list is The Little Mermaid.
5. I'm still participating in Inktober over on Instagram. Feel free to add me. Here are some of my favourite pieces so far.
no subject
If I may ask, how did you wind up figuring out hormonal therapy was necessary for mood swings? Like is it specifically for the PMS time? I ask because I am starting to swear I have PMDD when my "time" is creeping up on me and was thinking of looking into hormonal therapy at this point so I dont tear myself or my relationship apart during it.
ARGH! I woulda lost my shit about the sweater, but good for you just moving on and starting something new. I guess that's the "zen" part about knitting lol. Being able to realize you can't change something and just deciding to start again on something else after trying to find the skeins needed.
Holy shit!!!! Congrats on the homemade marshmallows! that is bad ass news. Pics of finished product?
Love your inktober sketches. You're very talented.
no subject
After my last big meltdown, I finally decided to dish to a friend about what's bugging me (she's a doctor, and it turns out, she's going through the same things). I have PMDD, too. Oh, and I'm calling it medicine, but I'm shortening ALTERNATIVE medicine. It was recommended I start with the over-the-counter or off-the-shelf stuff to start, and to my surprise, the cocktail is really helping. I still get some mood swings, but it's so tame compared to before. It was so bad - it got to the point where I had just ONE week of inner peace a month, if I was lucky.
I wrote about it in this post: http://diello.livejournal.com/574438.html
It's quite extensive homework to research what's good for balancing Estrogen Dominance, but man, it's really helped. I feel almost normal again (well, as normal as I can be, saying it RIGHT NOW during my period, hahaha).
I am PRETTY bummed out about the sweater, mostly that it was black and this monstrous Halloween green, and I had the best shoes to go with it. But it's all good. I'm thinking I can accessorize the scarf well enough.
And I've just updated this post to include Marshmallow pics :D
no subject
Mmmmmm the shmallows look delicious. Great job on em.